Jumat, 31 Desember 2010

How to Talk to Women / attract woman

Many guys don't have ability to attract a woman because most of them never taught how to talk to women.

A lot of us blame our lack of dating success on looks, money, power, or popularity…. But the truth is if you can learn to talk to a woman, flirt with her, and turn her on… you can attract women.

Now in order for you to understand how to talk to women in a way that attracts them… you must first understand what women find attractive.

To answer this we’ll start in two steps.

Let’s understand:
What do you say that turns women on?
And then…
What do you say that turns women off?
With this approach it will help us gain some understanding of the criteria that is most important.

What type of talk turns women off?
a.) To put it bluntly women are turned off by men who across as “needy.” Most men don’t realize that they are coming across “needy” when talking to a woman. But the woman picks up on it quickly. She can very quickly tell that you’re trying too hard to impress her. When a man tries to impress a woman it actually has the opposite effect. It turns her off.

b.) Women are not attracted to guys that come across as insecure. You can’t talk to women and seem like a nervous wreck and expect her to feel attraction towards you. A woman expects a man to be powerful, confident, and secure with himself. If she senses that you don’t possess those traits she will quickly lose attraction towards you.

c.) Women are turned off by guys who are “boring.” If you’re talking a woman you need to know how to keep the conversation fun. If you continually find yourself facing awkward silences, stuck in boring “interview mode” or talking about mundane topics like the weather… you can be sure that the woman you’re talking to will quickly lose interest.

d.) One of the major factors that will kill a woman’s attraction toward you is displaying a lack of social intelligence. Women are social creatures. And they blindly follow the social “norms.” If a man doesn’t seem aware of what is socially acceptable or “cool” she will quickly dismiss him as being “below” her. An easy way to do display a lack of social intelligence while talking to a woman is to make an inappropriate comment, not take the “cues” she is sending you, or continually tell jokes that no one finds funny.

Understanding these issues, you really can’t blame a woman for not wanting a weak, insecure, socially clueless, boring, or needy man. Ask yourself… do you find these sort of women attractive?

What type of talk turns women on?
a.) You have to know how to talk to women in a way that brings out her fun, flirty, and playful side. There is a song “Girls Just Want to Have Fun…” and the song is correct. This is especially true if you’re talking to a woman in a bar. She is there to have fun. You must be able to flirt with a woman in a way that makes her feel like she is back on the playground with her childhood crush.

b.) Women are creatures of emotions. You must be able to talk to women in a way that brings on an emotional state within her. You can do this by talking about emotional topics like her passions, childhood, vacations, or any other conversation topics that evoke emotion. It is also helpful to inject emotional words into your conversation when describing something. Instead of saying “it was fun.” Instead say, “my heart was racing with the rush of adrenaline.”

c.) You need to display that you are a socially intelligent man. Women are insanely turned on by men they believe have power, status, and social approval. The great part is that you don’t necessarily have to have any of these. You just have to talk to a woman in the same way that these sort of men would talk to her. You have to talk to her from a place of power, status, and SLIGHT superiority. Women are attracted to men they feel are slightly above them on the social ladder.

d.) You have to talk to her in a way that brings out her sexual side. The fact is, you can be having the greatest conversation in the world about a topic like “health food” but it will rarely lead to attraction. In order to talk to a woman in a way that leads to sexual attraction you must not be scared to talk about things on a more intimate level. This doesn’t mean you talk about sex… but it does mean that you don’t shy away from personal and intimate topics. These are the sort of topics that create rapport and have women start feeling a connection towards you.

The next question is how to talk to women in a way that gets women attracted to you?
Most guys don’t know how to carry a conversation with a woman, or talk to her in a way that makes her feel attraction to you. Most guys just wind up boring women.

I have coached enough men to know that most of them will freeze up in front of a beautiful woman. Or, they will become so nervous that they come across as insecure and boring.

Women expect a man to be able to LEAD a conversation in a fun, flirty, and sexy way. She wants you to be able to make her laugh, smile, and feel safe and secure around you.

In brief, the key to attracting a woman is to talk to her in a way that makes her feel so much fun and enjoyment around you, while slowly letting the sexual tension build, and then being dominant enough to go in for the kiss at the exact moment she is waiting to be kissed.

Ok… so what kind of things would a fun, flirtatious, playful, and sexy conversation contain?

15 Tips for Talking to Women in a Way that Attract Them :
1.) You should talk about “emotional” topics like childhood memories, future ambitions, or her passions. These conversation topics will open up her emotional floodgates.

2.) Women want a guy who is not afraid to lead her. While talking to a woman take control of the conversation. Never wait for her to dictate what you’ll be talking about.

3.) Pay attention to the non verbal cues a woman is giving you. If you’re standing too close to her, accidentally spitting when you talk, or making her feel uncomfortable in any way… she will send you hints. Pay attention to them.

4.) Remember this motto “Fun not Funny.” Women are attracted to men who allow them to have fun. Don’t concentrate on having the funniest jokes. Concentrate on showing them the most excitement and enjoyment.

5.) Tease women. One of the easiest ways to take a conversation to a fun and flirty level is to begin to tease women. Think back to your time on the playground. In the world of dating… what worked on the playground is effective all over again.

6.) Get intimate with her. Women are turned on by men who are not afraid to take a conversation to a personal, intimate level.

7.) Use things like “cold reads” to turn women on. Women love to hear opinions about themselves. Tell her what you observe about her.

8.) Avoid complimenting a woman too much. Women are turned off by men who come across as “needy.” If you are complimenting a woman too much she will think you’re trying to impress her. Which will have the opposite effect.

9.) If you want to know how to talk to women in a way that doesn’t bore them… Avoid asking too many “interview” style questions. Instead state your opinion about things.

10.) Remember: Statements over questions. Instead of saying “where did you grow up?” Say “You don’t look like you grew up around here.” This allows you to make observations about her and express your personality.

11.) Don’t hide your identity. Don’t be afraid to talk about whatever you’re passionate about.

12.) Never compliment her on her eyes, looks, or body.

13.) Say something that lets her know that you view her in a “sexual” way. If you don’t you run the risk of winding up in the “friend zone.”

14.) Use conversation “games” to keep the mood fun and flirtatious. Games can be anything like “truth or dare” or to less extreme games like the “5 questions game”

15.) Don’t give away your hand so fast. Women like men who are a challenge. If you want to keep a woman’s interest she has to feel like she is slowly winning you over. If she thinks you’re too easy… she’ll lose interest.

The best way to think about how to talk to women is to think about what kind of fun, playful, and sexual conversation you would most enjoy.

Talking to a woman is not difficult. You just need to be aware of what they are turned on by. And what turns them off. Follow the list above and you’ll do just fine.

The one thing I want to leave you with is: No matter how intimidated you are by the thought of becoming a “smooth talker”… you really are a lot closer than you think.

Once you make a handful of “tweaks” you’ll find that you actually enjoy talking to women- and will begin to see how easy it is to create attraction. Isn’t it about time you learn how to talk to women?

Reference at : http://www.tsbmag.com/how-to-talk-to-women/.

You might also like : The Pros and Cons of Being Friends With an Ex.

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